And the Heart was mine


Publisher, film critic and a voracious reader; wife and middle-aged mother of four. And a chance – a year in Rome! – to put her voice forward to be heard.

An intense, intelligent and sensual book about the desire to read and write, and to live.


After her glamorous 50th birthday party, the publisher and film critic Sara Ehnholm Hielm moves to Italy with her family. The year in Rome is reserved for writing; for finally writing a book of her own.

These exquisitely written, high-spirited and brutally honest essays draw a portrait of a woman who has been working with other people’s texts throughout her career; who can’t resist her own urge to write. Nor stop questioning her right to do so.

Struggling with the fragility of the process, she is trying to avoid the ultimate horror: not being able to complete her project. She takes inspiration from the books she reads as a respite to writing: Elena Ferrante, Karl Ove Knausgård, Chris Kraus and Lena Andersson.

It is all about trying to make a dream come true; about finally saying it all, just as it feels at the bottom of the heart.


“A wild, intense and extravagant collection of texts that describe the desire to write from one’s contours of a human being. The many brilliant wordings makes the reader want to underline.” – SWEDISH YLE




Original title

Och hjärtat, det var mitt

Year of publication


Original publisher

Förlaget M

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