End-Products (Loppuunkäsitelty)

A raw, unvarnished report on the consequences of an untimely death

Anna-Leena Härkönen’s doorbell rings. Two police officers stand on the step.
“Are you the sister of Kirsti Härkönen? I’m afraid we have bad news.”

The author’s sister has committed suicide. The news does not come as a complete surprise. And yet the finality of it all is crushing. The questions just won’t let go, and there are no answers.

But there are things that must be done, a funeral to be arranged, Kirsti’s apartment to be emptied, this and that. And there is a life of one’s own to go on with, family to consider.

How incredibly hard it is to accept that there are some things one cannot understand – not now, perhaps not ever.

I will never see you again, but that is not something I know as yet. You are still there, and you are breathing. My dear, sweet little sister. You look tired and pale,
but as beautiful as ever; you walk beside me, very close, almost one with me.